Chinese Hymnal Supplement 134, stanza 3 & chorus

“Lord, I love You, willing to follow You,
To run the race, to be well-pleasing to You;
Make me faithful, closely joined to Your Spirit,
Until the end, fully victorious, forever loving You.

   Ever living Savior, my hope of glory,
   Enliven my spirit, sanctify my feelings;
   Make home in my heart, that I may be full of strength,
   To apprehend Your love with all the saints, expressing the fullness of our God.”

Music & Lyrics Here (YouTube Video)

Attended a memorial meeting in Davis today. For some reason, the heading on the program — “Loved by the Lord / Loved the Lord & the Church” — moved me profoundly.

And…paper towels are terrible for wiping up snot dribbles. But at least better than the back of one’s hands.

Needing to post in a forum to accumulate enough points to maintain my free web hosting is starting to become a pain. The action of posting in the forums becomes a brain drain and saps any inspiration I initially had. So today, even though I’m at  a negative fourteen or so in points, I decided to forgo the maintenance. I’m not exactly sure how negative I have to become before I lose the hosting service, but I’m sure I can make up the points at some later time.

Sometimes opening my spirit, which also entails the opening of my heart, touches on such raw feelings that it becomes embarrassing, especially when attempting to pray out from the depths of one’s being. Perhaps that’s why I find myself intentionally hardening my heart and closing off my being, resisting the call to enter into the Holy of Holies. But eventually, you have to get to your spirit, if not for your own sake, at least for the sake of others. Then it becomes hard to hold it back. Good things the brothers just continue on as if things were normal.

I just remembered what I really wanted to post last night.

The saints, when they are in spirit…wow.

…what depth of  experience and wisdom.

“When we have a surplus of life, we can minister from this supply to others” (Crystallization-Study Outlines—The Epistle of John, Msg. 11).

Yeah…about that surplus…….

Was browsing my connections on LinkedIn today and noticed that one of my friends was listed as a VP at a multinational financial firm. And the thought at the forefront of all the other thoughts was, “…and I’m only an analyst.” I’m not that ambitious, but it makes me think, “Could I have also gotten there if I applied myself?” I guess the question isn’t so much do I want to be there, but whether I could have. And then I reflect on what I’m doing with my life.

Sometimes I feel like the frog in the well.

While I was brushing my teeth tonight, I thought whether I could take a week or two to go somewhere different, maybe exotic, maybe like Nepal. And then I thought, why just a week or two, why not take off for something like a year and just travel? If I’m not ambitious to be something, at least I should find out what’s outside of the well. I could take my Prius and drive around America, live off my investment account, experiencing the different cities, towns, communities. And not just drive through and look at the sites like a tourist, but stop somewhere for a few weeks, find some temp job at a grocer, interact with the locals, live. Problem is, I’d still have to consciously make myself talk to people. I guess when it comes down to it, chatting up strangers is still not my preferred resting state.